I cannot remember how many times I’ve been in situations where I felt like it was the end of the world. I simply ran out of hope, energy, and stamina to keep pushing and thought that it was “game over.” Those moments when I put everything I’ve got out there and got nothing in return. When I try ever so hard to reach the moon, but I don’t even reach the stars. It’s excruciating.
Back in the day, I used to struggle when such moments parachuted on me out of nowhere forcing me to surrender my will and power. They used to wear me out (not that they don’t affect me at all, now) and make everything seem unsalvageable. They fuel fear within me until that fear becomes the prominent thought that controls my actions which basically makes matters worse. After all, my life is a physical manifestation of my thoughts. I can either live my life out of fear or out of love, and I choose the latter in a heartbeat.
So I came to realize that there was a simple question that helped me, tremendously, to fight that fear head on, and usually win the fight. Whenever I reach that state, I ask myself, “what’s the worst that could happen?” To be frank, it’s not a magic wand that would take me from hopeless to hopeful. Asking this question is merely the start of brutally honest combat with myself because not only will the answer kill my fear but it will also pave the way for the same question to give a chance for another (sometimes more significant) fear to emerge. That combat will persist until I reach the bottom belief that’s causing the ultimate fear, which surprisingly enough has absolutely nothing to do with the incident that brought all that pain to me in the first place.
The irony is that I always look back at those moments and notice (with a little smile) how all of it happens for a reason, even if it doesn’t make any sense back then. And as Steve Jobs said in his famous speech addressed to Stanford graduates:
You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something – your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever.
We can’t win every battle against all our fears. But we can win the war against the ultimate one by realizing that the worst thing that can happen to us is still a blessing in disguise. We just have to wait until it reveals its grace.